Ellen Degenerate Bio BIO - JUST FOR GIrLS ... shhh!!!!!!!!!!!

Ellen Degenerate Professional Press Release

One day Vocalist/Guitarist Deryck Despotic was joined by bassist Brad Shitt, drummer Xenu, and live guitarist Adolf Dahmer to form Ellen Degenerate.

"Awesome". We say this word often but what does it really mean? Few things in history exemplify the true meaning better than punk rock band Ellen Degenerate.

We Got Sexy!! This band is way better looking than most bands. Sexier than the Falloutboy and Nickleback put together. This will mean many fans from the young female demographic who have a considerable sum of extra mony to spend on merchandise!!

We Gotz Urban Appeal!! And you thought 50Cent was tough? Ha! Ha! The band members of Ellen Degenerate although Harvard educated with appeal to the upper classes are also streetwise hustlers who will appeal to blacks and the ever expanding wigger demographic. An anecdote about the early days of Ellen best illustrates this. Bassist Brad Shitt was quoted as saying the following recently in Rolling Stone: "Yeah I know that bitch 50 Cent. He used to come to our shows dressed all emo with a fohawk and eyeliner. He was always trying to join the band and meet white women. Everytime I saw that fool I would drop my bass and jump in the crowd to beat his ass." How's that for a feisty youth who will undoubtdly facilitate a record company to suck the mony out of feisty young men everywhere? I agree, pretty good indeed!!!

We Got Punk Pedigree!! Hailing from Cleveland, Ohio Ellen Degenerate was the mentor of another great band called The Dead Boys. Ellen Degenerate actually wrote all of the Dead Boy's songs and played all of the music on the album "Young, Loud, and Snotty". Unfortunately, the band did not have great longevity because the members of Ellen Degenerate were all issuced scholarships to Harvard so they no longer had time to manage and the perpetuate the success of The Dead Boys. Dead Boy's vocalist Stiv Bators of Youngstown, Ohio was quoted as saying last week that, "Not only is Deryck Despotic a great poet, fighter, lover, and mind, but he is also a marketing specialist who has the know how and willingness to suck the money out of his fan's pockets. He is the new Gene Simmons for a new generation of Americans starving for mechandise". Respect among the punk rock aristocracy is widespread. In an interview Tuesday, Sid Vicious said the following to M.T.V. yesterday, "This band will move units and merch. Bottom line. Great merch., sexy look, end of story. Any record company who doesn't throw money at them is inept in business, and any journalist who writes one bad word is a cunt". Hey Sid, who are we to disagree?

-Deryck Despotic